From: email@example.com (Queltin)
I don't know how much is true, but here's a story:
Recently a New York psychologist, known to me only as Dr. L., passed away. He specialized in cases of sexual deviation, and many of his patients were pedophiles. He had planned to write a book about the many cases of pedophilia he had come in contact with over the years. Well, he never did, but he did keep a pretty good journal, and some people have been passing it around the social circles, keeping it quiet, I guess. I managed to get a copy of this jornal entry, and I decided to send it off into cyberspace. It's pretty raunchy, but I figured some people here might like it. If anyone knows about this guy whatever his real name is), or how to get their hands on the rest of the journal, please do so and post it. I've been assured by a close friend of both mine and his that this is indeed real, and he really treated the patients he talks about. None of this is made up, though I changed the names so I couldn't get in trouble. I also gave it a simple title.
Story 1: The Daughter (Written Oct. 15, 1993)
Phil was a thirty-year-old banker who, upon his last visit to me, had been dating his 32-yeend Janet for five years. The last year of the relationship had been somewhat infested by argument and turmoil in the relationship, but Phil had stayed with Janet for one reason above all others: her 14-year-old daughter, Tara, whose father had died seven years earlier.
He had watched Tara grow "from a chubby, flat-chested 9-year old to a dazzling 14-year-old with bright blue eyes, flowing brown hair, long legs, and a curvaceous body." His attraction to her, and consequent visits to my office, began in 1991, when the girl was twelve. It seems he had been at Janet's house late one night (which was usual because they normally went to his house, where they would be alone), watching a movie with her, when Tara came walking out from her room in her nightgown. As the young girl made her way down the hall, he couldn't keep his eyes from her. He observed that "she was developing breasts, and her legs were nice." Before this time, he claims never to have had any attraction to the girl, but after then, he saw her in the new light of sexuality.
He began inviting Tara on dates with her mother, trying as hard as possible to avoid any suspicions from either of them. Janet began to love him all the more for accepting her daughter as his own, but the guilt he felt due to the knowledge of his real motivations was overwhelming. He loved both of them.
In time, the problem grew worse. While engaging in intercourse with Janet, he began to fantasize about Tara. As he put it: "We'll be fucking and all, and I'll close my eyes and picture that it's Tara I'm fucking. That it's her little tits I'm sucking. Then I'd come and feel bad about it."
No matter what measures I took, it seemed impossible to cure Phil of his obsession with Tara. We tried conditioning, talking it out, and even once resorted to hypnosis, all with little result. Within a week of beginning any form of treatment, all obsession would always return.
In May, 1992, when Tara was thirteen, the situation worsened as Phil made his first advance of any kind on the girl, although he still managed to avoid any suspicion. Until this time, he had never made any suggestions to her in any way. As he put it: "I love her like a daughter, but still I want her. Her face, her legs, her ass, even those cute little feet of hers - she drove me crazy." At this point I should also note that Phil had a substantial foot fetish, and many of his fantasies revolved around feet.
Here is Phil's account of what took place:
"I came over to see Janet, all ready to go out that night. When I got there, though, Tara answered the door and said her mother wouldn't be home for like a half hour 'cause she got held up at work. So I think to myself, 'Classic porn movie set-up' right?
"Well, then I come in and sit on the living room couch, and Tara goes into her room to get ready because she's going out with her friends or something. Next thing I know, while I'm watching TV, she comes out of her room in the skimpiest little towel, headed for the bathroom. I made believe I didn't see her, but it was so hard not to look. She went into the bathroom, then. I think, 'Man, if only I could go into that bathroom and see her without her seeing me.' Then I realized that Janet told me the night before that the bathroom door lock was broken, and that she needs to get it fixed. So I start scheming. Man, I was torn. I felt so guilty about thinking it, but the urge was too much. I waited 'til I heard the shower turn off, then I heard that lovely voice of hers, singing some song I didn't know. I get up, all sweaty just from thinking about her, and go to the bathroom door. I stood there for a minute, then did it. When I threw the door open, She was standing there naked, facing me. I saw everything - her tits, which were bigger than I realized now, her pussy, with that wet pubic hair all around it, and her legs and feet. And I saw that shocked look on her face when she wrapped the towel around herself. I apologized, making like it was an accident, then stepped out. I heard her call behind me that it was okay, it wasn't my fault, that the door was broken. I felt like I was in heaven, after seeing that. I plopped right back down on the living room couch and jerked off. I never came so fast in my life. When she finally came out, in that towel again, I apologized, and she seemed embarrassed, but understood."
Needless to say, Phil began to feel very guilty about what he had done. At the same time, he felt like he'd finally gotten away with something. I told him that he had to stop, that he was headed down the wrong path, but he only said he knew and couldn't help it. Our session ended in argument, and he missed the next two months' appointments.
He did eventually start seeing me again, probably more out of habit than anything else. He was totally unwilling to follow any advice, but who was
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