Copyright © 2012, by the author. All rights reserved.
Please see my other stories and leave feedback at www.asstr.org/files/Authors/Trampoline/www/
Recently, a friend referred to what I as writing as porn. I did not object, but it bothered me, and did make me think. I really do not want to think of what I write as pornography. AM I writing porn, or is it erotica, and what, really, is the difference?
Wikipedia defines erotica as "works of art, including literature, photography, film, sculpture and painting, that deal substantively with erotically stimulating or sexually arousing descriptions. The term is a modern word that describes the portrayal of the human anatomy and sexuality with high-art aspirations, differentiating such work from commercial pornography." (ref)
Wikipedia distinguishes erotica from pornography, which it defines as "the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction." (Ibid.)
The goal of the writer, then, is the primary differentiation, according to Wikipedia. I think I would add "or sexual" before the last word in Wikipedia's definition of pornography, since I do see porn as primarily driven to titillate, to create SEXUAL arousal in the reader or viewer, not just emotional -- and the two things are definitely not the same.
I am also not altogether sure I agree with the definition of erotica, but I'd like to come back to that in a moment.
What bothered me, from my friend's comment, was that I had not been thinking of what I was writing as porn, although she clearly saw it as such. Is porn in the eye of the beholder, in the intent of the writer, or is it defined by objective external criteria? Since a bare ankle used to be considered pornographic in some parts of the world, the opportunity to define something retroactively by how it is later viewed by another is absurd. It can ONLY be defined, as Wikipedia does it, by the intent of the creator, or else by objective external criteria.
Using external criteria fails just as badly, however, because (as with the bare ankle) the objective criteria change from time to time and from place to place. Bare ankles, long ago, were considered too sexually stimulating to be displayed, and depictions of such were prohibited. Where I live, showing nipples in public is still considered an obscenity -- a fact which I find to be obscene, in and of itself.
The problem with external criteria is the same as that of defining it retroactively from someone's later reaction -- because that is always where "objective" criteria originate. It always comes from someone's subjective reaction, and reactions vary much too widely to objectify. Any attempt to legislate or otherwise control material based on external criteria can only result in abuse, because it will always be based on one person's subjective reactions, and not on anything which can stand up in a court of law.
For my part, there is some material that I would definitely like to keep out of the hands of children, but again, there is that problem with objectifying my subjective reactions. There are things which I do think are harmful to pre-pubescent or pubescent children, because I think the hormones affect the minds in such a way at that age, that they are especially vulnerable to influences which might cause them pain for decades. Still, that is just MY opinion, and who is to say it is the correct one?
If we come back to the intent of the writer as the defining criterion, we have a problem which is almost as thorny. One person claims their explicit video, with all manner of graphically- portrayed sexual acts -- you supply whatever acts you think are most explicit -- is NOT intended primarily to arouse, and another person claims their depiction of a person in a swim suit IS intended primarily to arouse.
One is tempted to say that the first person above is lying, and the second deluded, but if the first video is in fact a sex therapy consulting video, it most certainly CAN be graphically explicit, but NOT intended primarily for arousal. Also, if you think a picture of a swim suit cannot be taken primarily to arouse, you might want to google "swim suit" for images, with Safe Search turned off.
Once again, we must return to the intent of the writer. Those who want to censor and control will scream, "what if the writer is LYING?" My response is, "who cares?" It only really matters, if you want to censor and control -- to find a way to force YOUR subjective reactions down the throats of others. Otherwise, you might say, "that writer is incorrect, if she thinks that writing is THIS genre as opposed to THAT," but it becomes an intellectual exercise, not an emotional struggle for control.
Nevertheless, I care about what I am writing, and about how others view it. And so, finally, I came down to asking myself what is MY intent in writing these things?
The Danny Boy series started out as a personal fantasy, with no connection to reality, and no intent ever to have another person read it. I looked back at several incidents in my life, and wondered, "what would have happened, if things had gone just a LITTLE bit differently?" The resultant stories, explicit though they were, spun more out of my loneliness than out of any desire to titillate another. What I was seeking was love, not sexual release.
Because I was not writing for anyone but myself, however, the stories tended to be intensely sexual in nature -- not because sex was the objective, but because LOVE was the objective, and sex was the natural way to find that, when all societal mores are stripped away, and the characters are truly unburdened by baggage. Since no one else would ever read it, I was writing, for the first time in my life, without any limitations at all.
About the time I wrote the story with the first camping trip, however, a couple of phenomena started to make themselves visible to me. The first was that the characters were taking on lives of their own. They had things THEY wanted to do, which were not always what I WANTED them to do. I had put myself in their heads and hearts enough, though, that I did not want to force them to go where they did not want to go. I was fascinated by where the characters were going, and I wanted to know what was going to happen to them. What started out as a personal exercise to hold off the desperate loneliness of the world, was taking shape as something much more interesting.
The second phenomenon was that the story itself began to develop, building on the initial stories, in ways that fully caught my attention. As the characters, who had stumbled into relationships as loving as I had longed for myself, began to move forward from those beginnings, new characters and possibilities began to emerge, and I began to wonder where the whole thing was going.
As I write this, I am also writing chapter 30, and I now think I understand ALMOST all the pieces of where the story is going. There are still parts of three chapters to write, before I'm done the first draft, and can begin to rewrite. It has taken a long time, and a lot of meandering, before seeing a coherent story.
I finally decided, when I was ten or twelve chapters into it, that I should just post a few chapters on asstr.org, and see what reaction to them I get. I've been very gratified by the feedback I have received, even though some of it was sharply critical of certain aspects. The Danny character is not believable, nor are the women's reactions to him.
When writing fantasy for my own loneliness, it did not matter. Taken as story written for others, of course, I can see that they are absolutely right. No one of his age, however smart, can do those things, however extraordinary he may be. No group of women, taken as a whole, are going to respond to one man that way, no matter how good a lover he may be.
I have had two reactions from women, however, who said they wished they could be part of Danny's group, so I was glad that I did not miss the target completely with that one. I still want to hear more from women about what feels right, and what doesn't.
There was a third phenomenon which has been emerging from this, and I think it may, perhaps, be the only one which is actually important. In writing this story entirely without limits, I have been exploring some very dark and unspoken parts of the hearts of both men and women. Although many of the actions are over the top, there has been enough positive commentary on the characters and the events to make me realize that there are some things here which are touching people.
I don't by any means think I have figured out more than a small part of all the ways things work between men and women, but I do think I have increased my own understanding a great deal. Just possibly, I MAY have stumbled onto a small piece of something which might increase everyone's understanding, helping all of us, male and female, find the love which I think ALL of us crave. Almost entirely by accident, I feel that a door has been opened here to something which divides us all, and I find myself increasingly excited about the possibilities between us that exist when that door is open.
Going back to the initial question, is the Danny Boy saga pornography, I would say, absolutely, that it is not. Is it erotica? By Wikipedia's definition, I would say, yes, it currently is, but I don't think it will be on the rewrite.
Meandering through the story, the focus was on the events surrounding Danny, and his and others' reactions to them. The sexual experiences were described with great detail and intensity, as those were profoundly emotional experiences for Danny. When the story is pointing toward a conclusion, the extensive emphasis on sexuality becomes much less important than the development of the plot toward a goal.
Once the story comes to a conclusion, there will be a balance to the Danny character. He does pay a terrible price for his foolishness. He also rises from complete ignorance of women, through a series of amazing experiences, into a deep understanding of how women behave, even though he doesn't, actually, ever understand how they think. This new understanding gives rise to incredible arrogance, causing one huge mistake, compounded by several even larger ones.
In the end, this boy who is growing up through the book actually has developed some wisdom, but he has paid for it, full price. It is my hope that the final version of this would be something that a great many people would enjoy reading.
I don't, actually, think that erotica will be the right word for Danny Boy, when it is finished. The words "high-art aspirations" in the Wikipedia definition do apply, but the drive of the plot, when it is finally finished, is not actually going to be about the sex, even though it will still have a great deal of explicit material. The drive is about the love, about finding it, preserving it, and expressing it.
Danny Boy will always be highly erotic, but it will be, as it goes on, less about the sex, and more about the love. For now, though, it is erotica, and I hope that you enjoy it, despite its many flaws. Maybe it always will be.
If you have not left me feedback on the portions published so far, I would love to hear from you, even if you do so anonymously. If you have other thoughts on the meaning of erotica and pornography, I would be interested in hearing those, as well.
Trampoline
24 June, 2012
Please see my other stories and leave feedback at www.asstr.org/files/Authors/Trampoline/www/